Little Andy and Big Gray - each with a team of mates for support - were playing marbles at lunchtime in the school yard; Big Gray was slowly gaining all of Little Andy's marbles.
G: I'm gonna win! I'm gonna win!
A: Yeah probably, but it's not over yet.
G: I'm gonna win!
A: Shut up, you fat bastard.
The game continues; Little Andy has only a few marbles left, but he's holding onto them for dear life.
G: Hey! I think you're cheating. I should have won by now.
A: How am I cheating?
G:Your little girlfriend there fondled one of my marbles with her Manolos - she can't do that.
A: She didn't damage it. Plus, it was rolling away and she was getting it for you. She was too damn lazy to bend down and pick it up properly.
G: hhhmmm ... maybe.
The Game continues. Little Andy still has not lost any more marbles.
G: Hey! I think you're cheating. I should have won by now.
A: How am I cheating?
G: Jimmy the Lancastrian grabbed one of my marbles and was picking at it.
A: It was covered in mud and soil; he was just cleaning it for you.
G: hhhmmm ... maybe.
Finally, the lunch bell goes. Andy has now only 1 marble left.
A: Ha! That's a draw!
G: How is that a draw? I kicked your arse.
A: You have to get all my marbles to win and you didn't. It's a draw. Eat it, Fatty.
G: But you cheated!
A: Go tell that to a teacher if you think so.
G: Nah, that would make too much sense. I'll just tell everyone else instead. I'll tell the big kids and they'll come beat you up ... hey big kids: Chris, Yousuf, Mahendra, Shakib, Dan ... not, not you Rick. I said "big" kids ...
A: That's not fair ... I'm going to cry and tell my mum ...
Damn you Saffas for not winning; Purna those lions are ready, yes?
8 thoughts on this post:
It's going to be swinging in the next match, so unless Dale really gets his bowling up, the Saffers will lose as Jimmy will make hay. I can feel it.
I feel about as disappointing in JP and ABDV as it is possible for a non-saffer fan to feel.
Note how regularly that Stuart Broad is 'shocked' that someone might point out that he is doing something dodgy? All my pantomime dislike of him is becoming real. Next series he'll be 'astonished' again at people daring to criticise him for some other piece of poor sportsmanship.
The fact that Ian Bell is looking better than either of them is........ too silly to contemplate.
Haha this is utter gold Sid!
And please check this out (found it in NZ's quote unquote section at cricinfo):
"I would take an oath and swear on my children's lives that I saw Ravi Bopara using his nails on the ball to help it swing."
The outspoken Central Districts coach Dermot Reeve accuses the England import of ball-tampering following their defeat to Auckland in a one-day match
Ready, ready, ready.
Lou is right..Smith needs to win the next toss...badly! Otherwise the Saffers are properly fucked with the swinging ball.
Little Andy is apparently upset at the accusations. Don't worry little one, the lions will end your misery. Once and for all.
So what do we think of the accussations? I think Broad really was just too lazy to bend down and pick the ball up but as for Anderson ... looks as dodgy as all shit, Jim. But really, I don't think he was doing anything bu absent mindedly cleaning the ball.
The thing is, though, if the Saffas really thought it was ball tampering, why didn't they lodge a complaint?
Now I delete my post. Computer illiterate!
Two English ex-captains have said that if it had been Pakistan, the English team/media/followers would have screamed 'cheat.' Gotta agree there.
Pakistan players can't touch their balls without someone claiming they covered their hand in sandpaper first.
Exactly. The Saffers have messed up by going to the press and not filing a complain. Maybe it's one of their 'mental' tactics again. Idiots.
But if it had been Pakistan, you know the world would have paid attention to these interviews.
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