Jimmeh's back, he's on home turf and he's reminding Punter why he is the QLDer o' choice

As the Aussie players pop a few beers to celebrate the series win, Jimmy Hopes takes Ponting to one side for a wee chat:

J: Was I fucking swish out there today or what, Rick?

R: Yeah, yeah ... nice work in the field, mate, but a 50 would've been nice.

J: I did better than Ryan, though, didn't I? Huh, Rick, didn't I? Huh?

R: All round you did, but Bolly bowled better even than you.

J: That's just because he kisses that thing on his chain, which is not a crucifix.

R: What idiot thought it was a crucifix?

J: Oh, that Aussie woman who writes that blog ... you know the one that created the Ritzy cult? She doesn't know what she's on about. What the hell is it round his neck anyway?

R: Fuck knows, mate, but it seems to work so I just humour him.

J: Anyway, everyone knows that too many Queensland players on the side is bad luck ... one is surely enough and you know Harris isn't that good.

R: He's got bigger arms than you, Jim, and Gayle is scared of him.

J: He's also scared of Bolly, though, isn't that enough?

R: Have you seen the size of Chris? If he's going to beat me up, I want as much protection as I can get.

J: But Harris was our most expensive bowler today ...

R: was he ...?

J: Well if you don't count that flukey 2nd wicket, he was. And he can't bat for shit, so why you pushed him up above Ritzy today is anyone's guess, but I'm great with the bat I am. And we're pushing it already with 2 Tasmanians on the side, do you really want more than 1 Queenslander as well?

R: Good point ... and we already have Ritzy and Mitchy for our QLD quota ... Maybe you're surplus to requirements as well, Jim. Maybe we should opt for a South Aussie instead, like Tait, or go back to using as many Blues as possible ... Bracks is ready to return, or Smith ...

J: No, no Rick ... just get rid of Harris. I need this. Watto's getting the Alan Border medal tomorrow; Clarkey's got his modelling career; Bolly's got whatever fucked up religion he follows (not to mention his dancing); Ritzy's got his cult following ... what do I have? Please don't take this away from me and give it to a thug like Harris. Ritzy and me are planning to put laxative in Ry's sweet and sour tonight, so you can just say he has a stomach bug.

R: What? Ritzy's going for a chinese? About time he made himself useful. I'll have a wonton soup.

J: But what about this harris business?

R: Huh? I'll tell you what ... you make Bolly tone down the dancing and hold my beer for me all night and then I'll think about it.

J: Just think about it?

R: What? What are you thinking about?

J: You're not very smart, are you Rick?

R: I can hit a cricket ball real hard with my big stick thing.

J: Yeah, you can, mate. Yeah you can.