You have probably heard all the speculation about your potential retirement after the upcoming Ashes series
It's not that we really like you or anything, it's just that ... well ... we don't have anyone else. Katich reckons he can do it, and he has had some captaincy experience, but he's as old as you so he wouldn't be around long. The world knows Pup wants it, but is he really committed? Look at that shit he pulled over that slapper when you lot were in New Zealand. We couldn't let Mussey do it at his age - the insurance premiums would kill us, plus see above re: Katich. North has been rubbish everywhere; state captain or not, there's no fucking way. And Hads, well, he's not the brightest light in the tree now, is he? Plus, the temper is a bit unruly to say the least.
We really need you to stay until someone else is ready to step up. We really really want the Ashes back, it's true, but don't worry if you can't get them - we'll just blame Ritzy. Again.
Pretty pretty please don't leave us, Ricky. I'm the Chairman of Selectors (no, really) and I want you to stay.
Hugs,
Andy and the C.A. selectors
Because we can
14 thoughts on this post:
You do know the answer to the captaincy though, don't you Sid? Who is under 30 years old? Who has a firm place in the team for all three formats? Who has been performing decently with the bat in the last year? Who has experience and success with both bat and ball in hand? Who plays for NSW? I think we all know who the future captain will be...
It doesn't matter if Punter has an average of 10 for the next year, Hildy will still be rolling over like a puppy to have his tummy scratched whenever Punter lurches into view.
Some head of selectors.
And yet, the only reason I could ever back Clarke to captain the Aus test team is so that I don't have to put up with the pain of watching him embarrass himself in t20.
HT, you think My Lord will be captain? LOL
BTW I love that one of the prerequisites is that he must play for NSW. It's probably right.
Lou, you know I love Pup but he is in no way ready to be a test captain. I cringe at the thought. I really do think skipping outof NZ for Bingle betrayed a certain level of immaturity that we do not want in our captain.
Sid, I think the move fom Quoinslairnd to NSW will have done this candidate a world of good. Remaining a banana bender would have kept him in the wilderness, for sure.
I say give Cam White a chance. If he screws up just blame it on the fact that he is Victorian. Yes?
Cam White isn't even in the Test side and will probably never get there because arghh grr grrssmm rgghhsrrrr >:(
I support the Hauritz campaign. He has a brain, the above mentioned skills, experience also in terms of captaincy, a stylish way of fighting (blablablubb) and he is awesome.
Cheers,
Wes
NORRRRRRRTH!
Priceless, Sid. And I know you like Marcus, but why has Hilditch backed him for the Ashes, even before we go to India?
Because Hilditch wants to keep Punter happy - that is his main job - and Punter loves having Marcus North in the team. He uses him as one of his main captaincy consultancy sources in the field.
And Punter needs all the help he can get there.
I think we need to start a Hauritz for Captain campaign. He is clearly the only option. You've all sold me on it.
Can you imagine the response to that in Australia?
Purna does have a point, maybe not about the captaincy, but it is about time White got a chance in the test side. Also, I look forward to seeing Ferguson again.
Why is it that Punter relies so much on North? You'd think he'd have some idea what he's doing by now, but maybe most of Punter's brain was in the second head he got removed when he left Tasmania.
Hauritz would be a great captain, like one of those baby faced killer captains. The type that looks huggable and soft but would then deny someone a runner or appeal for a mankad.
Hehehe, I haven't heard the term "mankad" for ages. I love it.
One newspaper in Aust did once refer to Hauritz as a baby faced assassin. I like it. I'm convinced. I think we should all email cricket australia and demand it.
You'll have to make a choice though Sid - captain or caged?
I think I'd have to go captain on that one. Or I could tour with them and take a collapsible cage with me.
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