The Sri Lankans are in Town

They're here to play 1 T20 and 3 ODIs - so who's facing them?

Well, not Captain Kat because he has a broken finger. He wouldn't have played anyway, of course, but damn I hope he's back for the Ashes. We need our opening pair in working order.

Anyway, the one day team to face Sri Lanka is here:

Shane “I'm so good, I don't need Katto. Oh wait, no I'm not.” Watson
Shaun “I've been around for years but no one knows who I am” Marsh
Ricky “Clarke is rubbish, I want to be captain again” Ponting
Michael “I thought I did ok, you git” Clarke
Cameron “You'd have been fucked without me, Pup” White
Brad “Yeah Timmy's good, but can he abuse black people like me?” Haddin
Peter “I'm back, baby! And about fucking time” Siddle
Mitchell “not Marsh, not Johnson – I'm that other one” Starc
Steve “They are losing faith in Lord Nathan” Smith
John “of course I got picked, I play for NSW” Hastings
Lord Nathan “I'm missing the first ODI, my stock is going down down down” Hauritz
Michael “I've got years in me yet, fuck off Fergie” Hussey
Mitchell “the real one” Johnson
Clint “I surprised you all in India, didn't I?” McKay
Xavier “keeping the Tasmanian numbers up now that Hads is back” Doherty

The T20 side is pretty much as you would expect, but with John "who the hell am I, anyway?" Hastings in the mix:

David "missing link" Warner

Shane "they only go with me because they have no one else" Watson

Brad "I'm not as cute as Timmy, but I can hit" Haddin

Michael "I'm the captain this time. No, really" Clarke

Cameron "bloody Vic who should be captain" White

David "I ain't Mussey, but I am ok" Hussey

Steven "eat that, Ritzy" Smith

Steve "seriously?" O'Keefe

Peter "I'm not attractive, but damn I can bowl" Siddle

Clint "sound effect" McKay

Dirk "Sid loves you" Nannes

I know this mini-series is not at all important in light of what's coming up later in November, but I would really like to win something. Anything will do ...

Please?