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| So you girls are saying, if a batsman is out of his crease ... |
- Find a better opening batsman. He's not bad, but irreplaceble? Nope.
- Remind him that, strictly speaking, to be an all-rounder you need to be able to bat and bowl. And knowing what the stumps are for couldn't hurt, either.
- Pay Pup to kneecap him. In fact, if you smile sweetly enough, Pup will probably do it for free. He's been gagging to have a go for a while now. For the price of a beer, Katto might even help.
- Willingly risk the Ashes by praying he does very, very badly and is never picked again. Twatto really is that annoying.
- Have him move back to Queensland. If he isn't playing for the Blues, CA might just forget about him.
- If all else fails, kill Andrew Hilditch. Not that you need any encouragement to do this, really, but he does seem to be quite a fan of Twatto.
- Death threats. If we've learned nothing else from world cricket this week, we've learned that some well-placed death threats can swiftly remove a player. If he doesn't retire, you can always hope he leaves the country, searching for asylum elsewhere, and is suspended by his own cricket board. It seems to work.
6 thoughts on this post:
Couldn't we just do 6 anyway?
It is very tempting. You get his phone number and I'll make the calls? Deal?
He came and sat a few rows behind me yesterday, but I kept my mouth shut. It was quite a shock to see him in Blues gear for what must have been nearly the first time. They really shouldn't've let him open.
So you passed up a perfect opportunity to start off the death threats, di you? Well, I guess he could ID you a bit too easily, so we'll let you off. Next time, I'll have you one of those fake glasses and 'tache setups. OK?
Watching Michael Clarke nail Twatto with that ball made that entire ODI series worthwhile. Yes, including the loss.
Judging by Twatto's reaction, it must have hurt. Bliss. And: bless!
Next time, I hope he hits Twatto in the head. Pup for Captain NOW! He has the balls! You know it makes sense.
bettiwetti, unlike you, I am looking forward to Watson nailing Clarke in return with a throw from about 2 feet sooner rather than later.
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